Adventures In Job Hunting

The job search continues.

I'm tired. I'm worn out. I'm seconds from losing it.

I signed up on this website called "Snagajob.com" a couple weeks ago. They had a whole bunch of ads from legit businesses, so I had no problem thinking it was safe. But this week I had a phone conversation that sounded like this:

*Really heavy, obviously fake Chinese accent* "Herrow... you appry for job?"
"Um... yeah... Who's this?"
"You appry for job at Dairy Queen?"
"Yes, yes I did."
"You want to set up interview?"
"Ok... what day?"
"Satahday?"
"What time...?"
"2:00."
"Ok... are we just meeting at Dairy Queen, then?"
"Yes."
"Ok, thank you very much..."

When I hung up the phone, I was very confused, but had this growing sense of accomplishment. I actually have a job interview. Or do I...?

The call was sort of sketchy, and I got sort of a weird vibe from it. We missed a call from him earlier in the day, and called the number back to see who it was. When he first answered, his voice was kind of raspy and he didn't have an accent. Then, thinking they called the wrong number, we apologized and hung up.

Then he called back with a Chinese accent and set up an interview with me. O_o

He sounded really unprofessional, and at first didn't even sound like he knew why he was calling me.

After thinking it over a while and making a couple attempts to talk to the Dairy Queen manager to see if it was the same guy, I gave up and cancelled my "interview" (if that's really what it was...)

But tonight I got this message from Dairy Queen.

"Dear Kaylee Beutler,

We've completed reviewing the application you recently submitted to work at DQ - Hillsboro Dairy Queen.
Unfortunately, at this time our hiring managers have determined that the position you've applied for is not the best match for your skills and experience. We encourage you to explore our other open positions and wish you the best of luck in your job search." 

Um... what??? 

I have several thoughts about this email, but two of the most predominant thoughts are like this:

Oh my gosh I'm not even good enough to work at a fast food restaurant now??? How the heck to they ever expect me to get a freaking job??? Apparently you need experience to flip burgers and make ice cream cones now. 

And they've just completed reviewing my application? Didn't they set up an interview? I don't think that was them... but who is it if they knew who I was and where I was applying? Is there some psycho out there who knows all my info now? O_o 

So I'm currently jobless with no hope of finding anyone who would trust me enough to pull a soft serve lever, and on top of that have some sort of creepy pseudo-Chinese man stalking me. 

So that's been my week. 

How's everyone else's week been?

Bikini Barista

I've been looking for a job for a long time.

I've sent out several applications within a thirty minute radius of my house, and I still haven't found anything.

But even though my desperation is hinging on sending out applications to fast food restaurants (One of my last resorts), there really isn't any level of desperation that would force me to become a bikini barista.

Yes, that is a real job.

They're opening up a coffee shop about thirty minutes from my house whose gimmick is to have all their workers wear bikinis. Which I find weird, because normally the people who frequent coffee shops aren't really the type to care whether they're being served by half-naked women. It sounds more like a bar gimmick to me. :P

Putting aside everything that I said in the modesty post for a second, there are several other reasons I wouldn't want to work at said establishment.

1. Bare skin and hot beverages DO NOT mix!
2. If I put my hands on my hips I sort of have the physique of a wire hanger.
3. That HAS to be a health code violation.
4. Think of the drafts!
5. Any wardrobe malfunction to be had would be multiplied by 1 zillion.

However, I couldn't just not reply to the ad. It was just too... weird. So I could've either ranted about how disgusting and perverted their coffee shop was and just how do you expect your employees to be respected and think of the children who could walk by your store and get a glance at what kind of shady operation you're running and rant rant rant rant...

Or I could have fun with it a little.

Maybe I've been reading too many email pranks. But something in me snapped and I just had to mess with them. (Wow, Kaylee... anonymously sending a fake email in which hardly any human contact is made. You so crazy).

Anyway... this is what I sent.

"Hello! I saw your ad on craigslist, and I have to say that this job is exactly what I'm looking for! I have 3 years of barista experience and 4 years of exotic dancing experience (both of them got me through college... I'm an aspiring model). 

I've attached my latest bikini shot. Hopefully it's not too naughty. ;) " 

I attached this picture.

We'll see if they write back.